Of sports, sleep, snacking, and shaking.

Dear Frank Deford,

I miss you. When I started my new job back in June, I had to get used to a different schedule, going in at 8:00 instead of 9:00. I always looked forward to your sports commentary on Wednesday mornings just before 9:00. Now I don’t get to hear it, and it makes me sad. Perhaps you could get the station to move your commentary up an hour? Just a suggestion.

Take me out to the ballgame,

Dear Valerian Root,

Way to help me sleep last night. I even went back to sleep after getting up to go to the bathroom. Also, I had no headache or sleep hangover this morning. You rock.


Dear Mike,

If I have to tell you again that those cookies are for the church’s Halloween party, we are going to rumble. Stop eating the cookies. I will not take, “I forgot they were for the church,” as an excuse, you heathen.

Cease and desist,

Dear Cookies,

Thank you for being so delicious. But if Mike tries to eat you, run away. I heard about the Gingerbread Man. I know you guys can run. You are for the church party. Not for Mike.

What about the children,

P.S. Would you really be that much better with fresh pumpkin? We all know how I feel about extracting pumpkin.

Dear Mike’s New Nephew Luke,

You are cute. Please don’t be confused when we call you “Little Michael” for the rest of your life.

Aunt Kari

Dear Suede Vest,

On one hand, I love your orange color and how warm you are. You make me feel like fall. On the other hand, every time I wear you, Mike tells me that hugging me is like hugging a cow. I have mixed emotions about you, suede vest.

Undecidedly yours,

P.S. Mike would like me to point out that he said it was like hugging a SKINNY cow. As if that helps his case at all.

Dear Regular Coffee,

We’d been doing so much better, but today you made me feel empty and jittery. We are off again. Even though it was in the 30s this morning. I’m sticking with tea.

Finding it hard to type,

Dear Weather,

Would it be possible for us to have something between 80 and 30? Some nice sunny days in the 50s and 60s? No? Do I ask this every year? Yeah, I thought so.

At least the leaves are pretty this year,

Dear Anne Rice,

Carrying your book around was certainly an interesting experience. People make all kinds of assumptions about a person who reads Anne Rice. For the record, no, I’m not into vampires. Or the gnostic gospels. I did, however, enjoy your book very much. You obviously did a lot of research, and I learned a lot about the history of that time period, and I’m glad I read it. So, thanks.

Still not reading books about creepy vampires,

Dear Marie Antoinette,

You had really pretty clothes but your movie was kind of a mess.

At least Mom and I enjoyed the popcorn,

Dear Mike,

How ’bout I make you some cookies of your very own this weekend and you stop calling me a cow? I know you said skinny cow, but I don’t care.

Deal or no deal,

Cookie recipe stolen from Pemberley below the cut!

“Great Pumpkin Cookie” Recipe
2 c. all-purpose flour
1 c. brown sugar, firmly packed
1 c. Quick Oats, uncooked
1 c. granulated sugar
1 t baking soda
1 egg, slightly beaten
1 t ground cinnamon
1 t vanilla extract
½ t salt
1 c. pumpkin puree, fresh for “Great”, or canned for “OK”
½ c. (1 stick) butter or margarine, softened
1 c. semi-sweet chocolate morsels

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Combine flour, oats, baking soda, cinnamon and salt. In a separate, large bowl, cream butter; gradually add sugars, beating until light and fluffy. Add egg and vanilla; mix well. Alternate additions of dry ingredients and pumpkin, mixing well after each addition. Stir in morsels. Drop by spoonfuls onto lightly greased cookie sheet. Bake 20-25 minutes, until cookies are firm and lightly browned. Remove from cookie sheets; cool on racks. Yield: 50 cookies.

Martha Stewart wanna-be variation: After mixing all ingredients, drop ¼ cup dough onto lightly greased cookie sheet; spread into pumpkin shape using a thin metal spatula. Add a bit more dough to form stem. Bake and cool as directed. Decorate, using icing or peanut butter to affix assorted candies, raisins or nuts. Yield 19-20 cookies.

1 Trackbacks

  1. […] I am not sure I can be as witty and funny and funny as my friends… But i thought I would try to follow the lead of Brandi, Scott, Susan, and Kari… Dear Cost Cutters, Have you no shame?! Do you not have a moral code of right and wrong? Do you not cringe at bad hairstyles and is it not your duty to inform someone that the hairstyle they like not only went out of style twenty years ago, but it is in fact debatable on whether “style” can be used when referring to their cut at all? And yet you send my roommate home with what can only be considered a girl mullet. I dont care if she likes the front short and the back long. Have you no shame? How can you sleep at night knowing you did that to her? You charged her for that haircut. Shame on you cost cutters, and your mullet giving stylist. […]