And I’ve got nothing to say

It seemed like a companionable silence. We sat together, watching the movie, lost in our own thoughts. Maybe that’s all it was. Maybe the tension was only on my side – the words I wanted to say kept threatening to spill over, but I could never figure out how to introduce the topic, to tell you what’s been on my mind for so many months. I don’t know what you think, exactly, because I’ve never been brave enough to come anywhere close to the subject, and you’ve certainly never mentioned it, but I wish I could explain things from my perspective. Instead, we talk of this and that, and the wall formed by my silence makes it harder and harder for you to really know me.

Maybe you weren’t thinking about it at all. Maybe you had no idea that, for me, the room was full of unspoken words. But as we parted ways, I wished I had known what to say.

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