I’m a hazard to myself

So, most of you know, but for those who don’t . . . yesterday I sprained my foot. I am still not exactly sure what happened, but here is what I think happened. One of the other ladies here at the library asked me to give her backup at the desk, so I stood up to head that way. My foot was either asleep or I landed on it wrong, because it turned and made this awful popping noise and I face-planted right here in my cubicle. Being the tough strong girl that I am (in my head), I tried to walk it off, and I kept telling her I was perfectly fine. In fact, I was not perfectly fine, and I almost blacked out at the desk because it hurt so much. I was sure I was going to puke and then pass out in front of the patrons. Which would have been quite a story to tell afterwards.

All the mother-figures here at work got me ice and Advil, and my boss said I had to go to the first care place before I could go to the hospital to get it amputated. This is the kind of joke my dad would always make growing up. hehe. So, anyway, I sprained my foot, but luckily I didn’t break anything. I did get the afternoon off of work, and everyone is being very sweet today. It still hurts, but I am managing.

This is the kind of situation that brings my lack of graciousness clearly into focus. I’m not very good at accepting help in these situations. Mike had to drive me to work (it’s my right foot), and I moaned and complained about inconveniencing him. Yesterday one of my coworkers had to drive me to the doctor’s office, and I felt terrible about that. Right after it happened, the lady who had asked for help kept asking if I was okay, and I kept brushing her off. I was (and am still) embarassed about falling like that, and I also suffer from the I-don’t-want-a-big-deal-made-about-me-unless-it’s-on-my-own-terms syndrome. I’m not the most graceful person, but it’s just plain embarassing to fall like that and have everybody know about it and have to help me to the car and drive me home and so on and so forth.

I am sure there’s a lesson in there for me. Something about pride. It’s always about pride. *sigh*

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