You though the sun fell from the sky but I tell you you’re wrong

Mike and I had a really nice day yesterday. We went to church and then came home and did some housework. He got tired of waiting for me to finish decorating our house, so he started putting pictures and candles out. Of course, he put them in all the wrong places, so I had to rearrange. But his evil plan worked – we finally have pictures on our mantle, and more up in our kitchen. We still need to hang up pictures in the house, but it’s really getting to be more homey.

In the afternoon, I made the invitations for my birthday party, and he helped me with some of the measuring and cutting and that kind of thing. We had another couple over for dinner last night, and played Scattergories (I won!) and ate brownies and had a fun time with them. After that, Mike and I read a few chapters together in The Wedding (we are almost done). We had a very companionable day, no fighting or bickering or anything. And our house is clean! We both had last Thursday off, and it was a great day as well, running lots of errands and getting stuff done. It used to be that when we had a whole day together, we would often bicker a bit in the afternoon, but we haven’t lately. We haven’t had a whole lot of time together in the past few weeks, so that might be part of it. But things have been . . . good. It’s weird to say that, but they have.

Of course, that makes me scared. Do all these good times mean that something bad is about to happen? Is a shoe about to drop?

(If so, what does the shoe look like? I could use some new shoes.)

Another friend and I have talked about how we often expect the worst out of life. If there’s something good that could happen, we don’t get our hopes up that it will work out, so we can be pleasantly surprised if it does, but not heartbroken if it doesn’t. Guarding against disappointment. It’s not the most healthy way to live, but it can help you survive.

Even in the midst of fear and protecting my heart, I am starting to feel a little more hopeful. It’s as if I have been waiting for the sun through a long cold night . . . and the sky is just starting to turn a little pink. It’s coming, I can tell – I am not going to be able to hold out against the sun much longer. It’s coming, and so is everything that comes along with it, everything I’ve missed over the past year. Mike keeps reassuring me that he and I are going to be fine . . . and I’m starting to believe him.

Yesterday was really good. And I am glad.

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