I am not exaggerating when I tell you that Mike is addicted to socks, especially wool socks. As soon as it gets below 60 degrees, he’s all, “I better wear wool socks so I don’t catch a chill!” Don’t even get me started on how he really believes that cold feet will make him get a cold. I, on the other hand, never wear socks unless it’s absolutely necessary (and sometimes not even then). Atticus says, “Do you like socks, mama?” all the time with an impish grin because he knows I’ll get emphatic about it, and he agrees with Mike that socks are cozy. I love being cozy: sweaters and scarves and blankets piled high, but one of my favorite days of the year is the first day it’s warm enough to wear sandals in springtime. Freeeeeeedommmmmm!
So imagine Mike’s consternation when he found out that I got sweater tights for Christmas. Some people don’t deserve sweaters for their legs because they won’t really appreciate them, in his opinion. He hovered over them with an expression of pure longing and desperation. He glared at my legs all day. And I have to agree with him that sweater tights are way better than long underwear (which we don’t need most days here anyway).
Since Mike seems pretty definite that he’s not interested in wearing dresses, here, in no particular order, are the suggestions I gave him regarding sweater tights:
-Buy yourself some and wear them under your pants. Rejected because: that’s what long underwear is for.
-Get some XXL sweatshirts that hang down to your knees and wear sweater tights with them. Rejected because: Mike doesn’t think his legs are as cute as I do.
-Start wearing a kilt. Rejected because: not sure where to buy them and also of German descent.
-Tunics. Rejected because: too similar to the sweatshirt idea and not a Roman soldier.
-Be loud and proud like Conan O’Brien in his jeggings. Rejected because: the specter of Conan still haunts us all.
The temperatures here are crazy cold, and it’s been worse in other parts of the country. Hope you are warm and dry and most especially cozy, whether you have sweaters on your legs or not.