If I go crazy then will you still call me Superman?

Before the UNC/George Mason game, they showed the clip of George Mason’s coach saying, “Their fans think they’re Supermen. Our fans KNOW that we’re kryptonite.” I was like, “Haha, shut up.” And then, as Carolina played like crap, the announcers kept repeating it. Deliberately, I believe, to enrage me.

However, while watching George Mason play yesterday, I have decided that I’m a believer. They are kryptonite. But, of course, the coach had to come up with something different to say. The kryptonite thing is so last week. Here are our ideas for what it could have been.

MIKE: Their fans think they’re Wonder Woman. Our fans know we’re the Invisible Jet.

KARI: Or the lasso of truth.

MIKE: Neither of those make any sense.

KARI: Do they have to make sense?

MIKE: It would help.

KARI: I don’t think they need help getting fired up. I think it just needs to be catchy.

MIKE: True.

KARI: Their fans think they are the internet. Our fans know we are a virus!

MIKE: Do they want to be a virus?

KARI: If viruses win basketball games.

MIKE: Their fans think they are Hummers. Our fans know that we are . . .

KARI: Nails on the road!

MIKE: Their fans think they are gods.

KARI: Our fans know we are their Achilles heel?

MIKE: Their fans think they are Al Capone.

KARI: Our fans know we are the IRS.

MIKE: hehehe.

KARI: Their fans think they are Brokeback Mountain, but our fans know we are Crash.

MIKE: The underdog prevails.

KARI: Although their fans probably don’t think they are the gay cowboy movie.

MIKE: Details.

KARI: Their fans think they are Russell Crowe. Our fans know we are Joaquim Phoenix. And we have a knife.

MIKE: Their fans think they’re Russell Crowe. Our fans know that we are the fiesty concierge.

KARI: I guess being Joaquim Phoenix in that instance implies that we are dirty cheaters, which we wouldn’t want.

MIKE: Their fans think they are Tyler Durden. But our fans know that we are Tyler Durden.

KARI: Their fans think they are Tom Cruise. Our fans know we are Oprah’s couch.

MIKE: Their fans think they are the Fighting Irish. Our fans know we are the potato famine.

KARI: Their fans think they are weapons of mass destruction. Our fans know no such weapons were ever found.

MIKE: Their fans think they are Royales with Cheese. But our fans know we are the Hamburglar.

KARI: Their fans think they’re Bill Clinton. Our fans know we are Monica Lewinsky.

MIKE: Their fans think they’re The Usual Suspects. Our fans know we’re Keyser Soze.

KARI: Their fans think they are a really great ship, like the Titanic, but not the Titanic since it is a symbol of failure. And our fans know that we are an iceburg.

MIKE: Their fans think that they are Star Wars. Our fans know that we are George Lucas.

KARI: Their fans think they are the Beatles. Our fans know that we are Yoko Ono.

MIKE: Their fans think they are Apollo Creed. Our fans know we are Ivan Drago.

KARI: Their fans think they are the Berlin Wall. Our fans know that we are David Hasselhoff

MIKE: Their fans think they are Snakes on a Plane. But our fans know we are Samuel L. Jackson.

KARI: You win.

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