God is in the Tub

Have you met my theory that God Doesn’t Do Free Throws, Awards Shows, Or Reality Television? It’s one of my favorites. God is busy, Danielle. It’s like the way you don’t bother your mom to break up fights between you and your sister when she’s relaxing in the tub. Come to think of it, that will work. Think of God as in the tub, Danielle.

When I read the above, I knew it was an instant classic. Mike and I watch a lot of reality television (actually, now that I think about it, the only shows we watch are reality television), and as far as I am concerned, there are far too many reality show contestants who petition “God” to help them with those silly challenges. I take great pleasure in saying, “IN THE TUB!” when I hear contestants praying.

But where it really resonated with me is the free throw issue. I would like to propose that it extends to sports in general. I don’t pray about sports anymore – every sporting event I ever prayed about, my team lost. Every single one. I can’t decide if I think that God doesn’t care about sports or what. As a Christian, I think that God cares about everything. But I have seen some evil teams emerge victorious over my teams (which, of course, are the pinnacle of all that is good and right on the earth). I think God watches quite a lot of sports while in the tub.

I was really challenged a few weeks ago when a friend of mine (who is not a sports fan) asked me why I like sports so much. I didn’t really have a good answer. I am a pretty competitive person, and I appreciate athleticism even though I’m not athletic myself. I also enjoy feeling like I’m involved in a community of other people who are rooting and hoping for the same thing. After the Panthers lost the Superbowl, I was actually pretty sad for a day or two. I really enjoyed the frenzy that the entire state was in – being connected to other people just because of our Panthers sweatshirts. In the height of my crazy UNC basketball fandom days, I would be absolutely devastated when my team lost. It would ruin my entire week. I have gotten a lot better, but it’s not actually been me moderating how I feel. I just don’t follow Carolina as closely as I used to. I really would love to get to the point where I can watch and enjoy sports without being so emotionally invested in them. Since there’s no rhyme or reason to which teams win and which teams lose, after all.

Maybe I should get this shirt to wear during March Madness. And during October. And the Olympics. And the Superbowl. I better get more than one.

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