a profound mystery

When I was almost five, my parents celebrated their tenth anniversary. My dad gave my mom a ring with nine diamonds on it. I asked him why it wasn’t a ring with ten diamonds (I was very proud of myself for figuring out the flaw in his plan), and he told me that he had already given her one when they got engaged. This was logic that even a four-year-old could not argue with.

Mike has told me for many years that he would like to get me another ring for our upcoming tenth anniversary. I have had mixed feelings about it – I do enjoy shiny things that sparkle, but I probably enjoy them less than the average girl. We replaced my engagement ring a couple of years ago when the one he bought originally gave up the ghost. Besides, what I really wanted was my mom’s ring.

I learned a lot about being married by watching my parents. I watched them love, honor, and cherish each other. I grew up knowing my dad would do anything, anything, anything in his power to make my mom happy. I watched my mom trust my dad to make the right decisions for our family, and I watched them make those decisions together. I knew they disagreed sometimes, but they presented to us a united front. They were not perfect together, but I did not have trouble understanding what Ephesians 5 could look like. I saw it. Every day.

The very last thing that my dad told me and Mike was to take care of each other. That was certainly what my parents did, through richer and poorer, sickness and health. They took care of each other for 32 years before he lost his battle with pancreatic cancer. Mike and I have only experienced a small portion of that, but we have learned some things about sacrifice and commitment and the profound mystery of two becoming one.

For Valentine’s Day, my mom gave me the ring. I am proud and thankful to be able to wear it as a reminder of where I have come from and the commitment that Mike and I continue to make to each other every day.

profound mystery

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18 Comments

  1. Barbi

    Mom told me about the ring while she was here. Your Dad would be so proud of you and Mike and proud of your Mom and Joe. The ring look incredible together.

    Posted 3/14/2010 at | Permalink
  2. Nancy

    You are really blessed to have the family you do, Kari, and the role models you had. I pray that Matt and I can overcome our histories so that someday Isaac will look back and have memories like yours.

    Posted 3/14/2010 at | Permalink
  3. Once again, my friend, you have reduced me to tears.

    Posted 3/14/2010 at | Permalink
  4. Beautiful. The story and the rings.

    Posted 3/14/2010 at | Permalink
  5. Love this post, so sweet and beautiful ring!

    Posted 3/14/2010 at | Permalink
  6. Carol

    It looks so beautiful on your finger…can’t think of a better place for it. And I am thankful that in spite of all our shortcomings and failures you were able to see and “catch” some positive things from the love that your Dad and I had for each other. I am very proud of you and I know he was too.

    Posted 3/14/2010 at | Permalink
  7. I love this post, too. Married love so often is overlooked for young, new, butterfly-type love. That is why I love this post. You tell the beautiful story your parents lived of covenant and promise the way it was meant to be.

    Posted 3/15/2010 at | Permalink
  8. Melissa

    I did not grow up with this kind of example. But I think my husband and I have the kind of love for one another that your parents had. And I hope one day my little girl will tell a story similar to yours! Thanks for sharing:)

    Posted 3/15/2010 at | Permalink
  9. Wow, girl…that is beautiful. (and the ring looks gorgeous, too.) 😉

    Posted 3/15/2010 at | Permalink
  10. judy

    Thank you for sharing. Your story moved me to tears. I too lost my husband of 38 years to pancreatic cancer. It is 10 month since I lost him and needless to say I miss him so much. My life at present is still the same but my world has just turned upside down. I am blessed with my five really great and supportive children, a very close family and a handful of dependable and wonderful friends, but despite all these blessings I find myself lonely and yearning for the one person that is gone from me. Loosing a loved one can be so difficult.
    You are so lucky to have your loved one to share your life with. I pray that you will have many many happy years together. Your parents rings look so beautiful on your fingers. May their beautiful love story guide you and your husband .

    Posted 3/16/2010 at | Permalink
  11. What a beautiful tribute to the love your parents shared! I have my mother’s engagement ring and I cherish what it represents, the love and devotion my parents had for one another.

    Kat 🙂

    Posted 3/16/2010 at | Permalink
  12. What special gifts. Your ring. Your parents’ love for each other and you. Your love and commitment in your marriage. Lovely!

    Posted 3/16/2010 at | Permalink
  13. What a beautiful example your parents were to you!!!

    Posted 3/16/2010 at | Permalink
  14. Kyra Joy

    Very nice post. You often amaze me wiith your insight and thoughtfulness.

    Posted 3/16/2010 at | Permalink
  15. THAT was beautiful

    Posted 3/16/2010 at | Permalink
  16. what a beautiful testament to your parents’ marriage …

    Posted 3/16/2010 at | Permalink
  17. Kari, what an amazing testimony – and what an amazing heritage. (So glad to have found you through chatting with the sky.)
    Blessings,
    Dorothy in Arizona

    Posted 3/17/2010 at | Permalink
  18. What a amazing legacy…this is the kind of love story I love to hear about! Thanks for sharing!

    Posted 3/20/2010 at | Permalink

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