The amazing disappearing guacamole.

KARI: Where’s the guacamole?

MIKE: It was turning brown on the top.

KARI: Sooooo?

MIKE: . . .

KARI: So, where is it?

MIKE: I ate it.

KARI: All of it?

MIKE: Yes.

KARI: You ate the whole container of guacamole?

MIKE: Yes.

KARI: The whole container? That my aunt flew up from Florida?

MIKE: Yes.

KARI: The whole container that my aunt flew up from Florida for both of us to share?

MIKE: It’s the only thing I had to eat today.

KARI: I didn’t even get to taste it.

MIKE: You don’t like guacamole.

KARI: Yes I do! I introduced you to guacamole!

MIKE: It was in the house at least . . . eight hours. You had your chance.

KARI: I was sleeping then! We brought it home last night!

MIKE: And then you left me alone with the guacamole.

KARI: And then I went to work! To make money!

MIKE: I have lost weight since yesterday. The guacamole diet. Just eat chips and guacamole, and you, too, can lose weight.

KARI: What about cholesterol?

MIKE: My diet is for those Hollywood stars who don’t care about cholesterol. They only care about being thin.

KARI: I am pretty sure that your diet is not going to make anyone thin.

MIKE: Look at the scale. You can’t argue with results.

KARI: You are trying to distract me. But I will not forget that you ate the whole container of guacamole. And I got none.

MIKE: You snooze, you lose.

KARI: I was sleeping, yes, but I don’t think I should be penalized for sleeping at night instead of eating guacamole.

MIKE: Those are the rules.

KARI: Did you eat all the salsa, too?

MIKE: No. You like the salsa.

KARI: I LIKE THE GUACAMOLE, TOO.

MIKE: I thoughtfully left you the salsa.

KARI: Did you have any?

MIKE: No.

KARI: If you eat my salsa, I will cut you.

MIKE: It’s just food.

KARI: Says the man who ate an entire container of guacamole.

MIKE: It went really well with the piece of cheese I stole from your bag.

KARI: . . .

MIKE: Please don’t cut me.

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16 Comments

  1. Yay!

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  2. dawn

    hooray! i love the kari and mike posts!

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  3. Mike has been stealing the cheese?!

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  4. If Mike’s the culprit, I suggest we change his nickname from Mr. Blazer to something secret-agenty, like Ethan Hunt or James Bond or Undercover Brother.

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  5. i’d have eaten the salsa….i’m not a big fan of guacamole, though it is an enjoyable word to say.

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  6. Rebecca

    That totally sounds like a conversation that would take place in my house :)

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  7. Kari

    No, no, he didn’t steal the cheese. He just thinks the cheese-stealing is hysterical, and likes to bring it up whenever possible.

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  8. I don’t know Mike, but I am in favor of calling him Undercover Brother.

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  9. I usually end up torn between the two of you when these exchanges happen, but … MIKE! HOW COULD YOU!?

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  10. i’m sure mike would rather go by MASTER CHIEF!

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  11. The MC is NOT a secret agent who specializes in deception and stealth. He is a seven-foot-tall half-ton of walking, talking asskickery. The MC does nothing quietly; he does them quickly, loudly, and explosively.

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  12. Kari

    My only thought is that “quickly, loudly, and explosively” sounds an awful lot like what happened in the bathroom after Mike ATE ALL THAT GUACAMOLE. So, perhaps Master Chief is the right name after all.

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  13. Bathroom humor from Kari?? That’s gotta be one of the signs of the Apocalypse.

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  14. Whoa. Between the cheese comment and the loud farting comment … I’m speechless.

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  15. Kari

    I’m on a roll this week!

    Posted 5/11/2006 at | Permalink
  16. remember this day gents!

    Posted 5/12/2006 at | Permalink

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